没有人会喜欢隐藏自己的人

没有人会喜欢不隐藏自己的人

那我到底应该怎么样？

the absolute irony of life

it has been a year without you.

whenever mum is not sober, she will ask many questions.

why why why why why?

questions to which there can never be satisfying answers.

questions that i'll never know how to answer.

in fact, nobody knows.

so what's the point of asking?

why ask?

times like this, i feel like asking her to stop asking.

it's just a waste of tears.

i'm not saying that i'm without doubts. i'm full of them.

why am i the one to endure this? why am i forced to go through this? why can't it be someone else? why does fate pick on us? why can't we spend a longer time with each other?

endless string of questions that the child of life will never finish joining the dots to the right answers.

right objective universally accepted answers.

but what can we do?

honestly, what can we do?

nothing. absolutely nothing but to pack up the mess, suck it in, move on.

that's all.

upon death, perhaps we'll know. perhaps we'll bring the questions with us into the coffins.

homo sapiens are so ephemeral.

i hope that before my flame goes out, i've brightened up ppl's lives.

dad, u did. definitely.

you've lit a flame in me that will never go out till my life ends.

i cried myself to sleep ytd.

thinking of last year... this time...

how i wish i could sleep these days away.

just go into hibernation.

last year's father's day, we were plucking the bean sprouts' roots.

and then dad helped bathed the cats.

we watched them dry their fur in the wind and teased oka and xixi which hate each other.

and then tragedy.

happy belated father's day.

last year, this time. we were at the hospital. i was thinking whether to buy a cake for brother. but i didn't in the end.

why didn't i?

i don't know.

i should really have.

the day is nearing.

i don't even dare think about anything.

it's june.

i had a lot of horrible dreams recently.

my 2 closer friends died in my dreams.

my close friend's mum died in my dreams.

details.

i'm not keen to remember.

watched dance subaru with charms today.

dance, not for anyone, but for yourself.

i should start to do that. and not dance to forget.

i should dance for myself.

i belong to the stage. and i know that.

perhaps that's the only world i belong too.

perhaps.

without me, it's ok.

it's still the same.

看到neko眼睛半开，动也不动的样子，我的心不禁开始悸动

上前一看，原来它正处于半睡半醒的懒状

才愕然发现

我的心脆弱了很多、很多、很多